The 3 things I knew before I became Mama

Before becoming a Mama I knew a few rules my littles would definitely live by, like no screens before 2, no sweets until preschool, and no cosleeping. Lol I love how I thought this would a realistic, it shows how young and naive I really was about this whole parenting gig.

The first rule, no screens stems from the barrage of Facebook parenting experts posting articles stating the screens are the root of all evil. That if your child even glances at a screen before the age of 2 you will be battling the screen issue for all eternity. These articles were not all anecdotal some of these sources were pretty credible like the American Association of Paediatricians, so with experts like that making the recommendations they must be followed right? Righ?!?

I have to say that this was a rule we were really good at for about 10 months, but for this Mama who was fortunate enough to have a full year of maternity, but lives 20 minutes out of town and doesn’t function well when the isolation starts to make her feel like a recluse, she needed a little more than the sounds of talk radio during breakfast. So the breaking of this rule was completely selfish, I needed Monkey to give me just 10 more minutes to think straight in the morning, and get just a little more tea in me before facing the day. This is when Studio K, and more specifically Scout came into our lives.

Scout is a purely Canadian show that will make any banjo loving, biodynamic eating, Hunter wearing millennial’s heart swell. The program is about 7 minutes in length and focus on the subject of mindful living and critical thinking through solving a daily mystery with 3 clues. The first time I watch it I cried and wanted Monkey to be a Gumboot Kids too. This was then end of no screens for Monkey. 

Now his screen time is still extremely limited, but he can have a little screen time to catch up with Scout in the mornings with a sprinkling of Paw Patrol and Beat Bugs from time to time when Mama needs a little more time. 

My second thought on parenting was no sweets before preschool, because in all reality no one needs chocolate, or ice cream or cake or cookies right? They are just refined sugar and have no health benefit whatsoever so why would I feed that to my little…. Ummm because if you only did things in life that had a physical, intellectual, financial benefits we would never have fun, or learn from our mistakes. 

For close to a year Monkey thought plain full fat Greek yogurt was ice cream. He ate is every day for dessert. Then one day, about a week before is first birthday when he was eating his dinner and I was eating a Blizzard I had picked up on our way home from a play date. Because vanilla ice cream looks like plain Greek yogurt he wanted some. This was the end of rule number 2. And how could you deny a little something that is this cute

And lastly the rule that we broke the fastest. Absolutely no cosleeping. We were not even really open to room sharing before Monkey was born. We wanted him to go from hospital to nursery. We thought why have more transitions than necessary, plus wouldn’t everyone sleep better if they were in their own spaces? 

Although I believe this is very true and if we are blessed with another monkey we will most likely not cosleep, there are so many benefits to doing so as well which is how we fell down the rabbit hole. When Monkey was discharged from hospital part of his discharge plan was that he room share. So we went out, bought a pack n play for him to sleep in. 

In the beginning we kept Monkey awake and when he woke up both Michael and I were both awake leaving no one rested for the day time. But eventually we all got used to one another and everyone was sleeping better. Then when Michael left to work out of town the cosleeping began, because it was just me and Monkey, all day for weeks at a time; and it was so much easier to just cosleep. 

And even though I believe there are wonderful things that can come from cosleeping, this is not for us. It caused far too many bumps in the sleep training road, but I am glad I tried it. 

After just over a year of Mommying I have come the conclusion that I was definitely a much better parent before Monkey came along! There are so many ins and outs and ups and downs that arise once your little comes you can’t even imagine how your points of view change. So for all you Mama’s to be out there, write your rules in pencil so you can adjust accordingly. And for all those Mamas out there adjusting their plan every day you are not alone… we are all making this up as we go along.

What was your biggest parenting misconception pre baby? Let me know in the comments below!

25 thoughts on “The 3 things I knew before I became Mama

  1. As a mom to five, I can relate to a lot of this. I learned something new with each baby. I didn’t cosleep and I think that was good since I ended up with a lot of kids and I have insomnia and the slightest movement in the bed wakes me up. I used the Pack N Play when they were little and I kept my preemie in the room with me the longest but as soon as I could, I moved them to their own rooms. Something else I learned was to not be afraid of mess. Let them play messy. Let them eat messy. That’s how they learn!


  2. I can certainly relate. My opinion pre-baby and post baby have evolved. As a stay at home mom juggling a multitude of tasks I think we need to be flexible and stop being so hard on ourselves.


  3. This is such a wonderful post and you write so beautifully! Really lovely! I have been thinking about what I can expect now that we are planning to have our first child and thank you for sharing your experience with us!


  4. Bedsharing was a big no no on my list as well but within a week our daughter was in our bed and now at 16 months is just now in her own room for naptime and bedtime. It worked for us but with expecting the second one in October, I still don’t plan to bedshare but we will see what this little guy has in store for us!


  5. Isn’t it funny how we have all these ideas before we become parents about how we will do things, and while some of them stick…when you’re in the trenches of raising a child sometimes you realize just how much you didn’t understand when you were sitting on the sidelines. We live, we learn, and we become flexible. ๐Ÿ™‚


    • That’s exactly how the transition happened for me! I didn’t want him to be behind in using technology and I needed a break!


  6. I failed miserably at the no screen time as well. I have no problem admitting that the entire Baby Einstein series saved my sanity many times! Many…many times! I did hold strong for the co-sleeping thing. I was vehemently opposed to it because I refused to have an infant who turned into a 5 year old who wouldn’t sleep in his or her own bed. No way! My thought was always, “My bed was for to me to sleep in…you have your own room and your own bed and that is where you sleep!” Probably my biggest misconception about parenting was food. I just thought all my babies would grow up to be fruit and veggie loving champion eaters…yeah…not so much! My babies aren’t babies anymore though (16, 13 and 11 now) but I still think about things that I thought I knew that turned out a whole lot differently!


  7. LOL I’m not a mom to any human kids, just furry ones. Funny how we think we will parent one way and realize there may need to be some changes. ๐Ÿ™‚


  8. “write your rules in pencil so you can adjust accordingly”… this is brilliant and totally true! My son is almost 4 and we went (and keep going) through similar processes. I think it’s all about balance. On a side note: I also broke the TV rule for your same reasons but found great educational cartoons like “Super Why”, “Super Wings” and “Dino Train” for him to watch for certain periods of time. ๐Ÿ™‚



  9. Great post! I especially love the little video. Aren’t you glad there was some glass protecting the sweets? ๐Ÿ˜‰ Love how you ended the post: writing down your “rules” is a really good piece of advice!


  10. Haha, this was fun to read! The screen issue…we were so adamant with our first to limit the time he looked at screens. But by the time he hit school, his teacher pointed out how far behind he was by not being used to computers and tablets. Most of the testing they do now is on a computer. And when it comes to making friends, he had little to relate to because he didn’t have the same experiences with games, tv shows, etc. his teacher also pointed out that technology is becoming a huge bing in the workforce!


  11. LOVED your post! I didn’t have any rules or ideas that I could ‘break’ per se, but I had things I was scared of doing. Like co-sleeping. I was petrified of it. Until that was the only way that my son would sleep. I got used to it very, very quickly. Now it’s breaking my heart that he wants to sleep next to me, rather than on me. Ironic, no?


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